When I was in high school my Dad would always wait up for me to come home. He was what you'd call strict about our curfew. I remember one night he said something to me that I never forgot. After complaining about my lack of freedom, he got really quiet and said "you should be so grateful that someone cares enough about you to wait up, it's a blessing to have someone expect things of you."
It didn't understand it then. But I do now.
Ben and I just celebrated our 11 year anniversary. It doesn't seem like it has been that long, but it does at the same time. I think you just become such a part of each other you don't really notice when it happened. I thought a lot about how our marriage has changed. For one we don't really discuss what Ben likes to eat, I just make it and he just eats it. There are a lot of unsaid things. A lot of unsaid expectations.
I know he will study when he doesn't want to. I know he will come home. As soon as he can. Everyday. I know he will be happy to see us. I know he will play with the kids and they will never know how tired and hard it is to be in school as long as he has. I know why he's doing it. I know he will go to church with us every Sunday. I know he is the same person away from home that he is at home. I know he is good, deep down where it counts. I know he is worthy, and loyal. I know this and I expect it from him. I know he expects it from me.
I know he expects me to get up and smile and take care of our kids even when the days run into each other. I know he knows that he can call me if needs something and I will take care of it. I know he expects me to live the way I believe. I know he expects me to teach our children what that means. And when I climb into bed at night with a blue shirt on my head and pretend that it is my hair, he doesn't even flinch. Because he expects that I will never really stop being weird. (on a side note, I informed him that even if something like that doesn't surprise you it doesn't mean you shouldn't at least acknowledge the fact that someone is pretending to have long blue hair and at least ask them about it so they can finish their joke.)
I know that he loves me. I know that he knows I love him. We expect it of each other. We expect that life isn't always easy, but it's ok. Because at the end of the day we still have each other, and we really are true friends. The forever kind. With promises made between us that we expect each other to keep.
And my Dad was right, it is a blessing, of the purest kind.
5 comments:
You lady have a great gift with words. So beautifully said and so beautifully true. How did girls like us end up with such great men?
Hahaha! I'm guilty of that blue hair crime. I sometimes don't comment because I already know what he's going to say. But really, he's just trying to see me smile, so I should indulge.
You guys are such a great family. I really wish you were our neighbors. Or even in the same state. I'd take that.
Carly, your blogs usually...well always...make me giggle and laugh until tears roll down my face onto my blouse. Today, I wept. The tears from a heart so full it couldn't contain them, splashed down my face and onto my blouse. I love you so much, Carly. You are "the joy in my posterity". Perhaps, someday you will "know" how I feel when Olivia posts her blogs. Today you have verbalized what my heart and mind have always known about Benjamin. Thank you for being the sweetheart to match his mountains in every respect. I love you both. Christy
Happy Anniversary! Beautifully said!
Yep...I remember those days when you sighed: Mom will I ever have a boyfriend or just boys who are my friends...looks like your got both and a real keeper at that! He's lucky to have someone to keep him laughing too.
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